Tonight was the best night of summer, and it was definitely one of the best nights of my life. I was surrounded by my family and extended family. Tonight was a night when I experienced an overwhelming flow of muddled up, boggling emotions. I don't know what triggered my inhibitions, what pushed me to this realization. Perhaps it was the delicious food we had, or the various drinks at the table. Maybe it was the fact that I could trust every single person in that room, that I loved them all. Whatever it was, I have finally come to terms with the fact that in less than a month, I will be heading to a strange and foreign country, where I have no family, very few friends, and no loved ones. As I take that flight to New York City, I will be leaving behind not just places, but people, memories, feelings. I will leave behind my innocence, and for the first time venture out of this shell I was raised in. I will be completely free.
But freedom has a price, and I will pay it without a doubt. For freedom comes with responsibility, maturity, thoughtfulness, and a clean conscience. It comes with a sense of loneliness. It requires emotional and mental strength. Isn't it strange that something as liberating as freedom can push us to our dreams, but completely hold us back at the same time?
I was asked a question tonight- my ultimate life goal. Honestly, the question took me by complete surprise! I've never been able to look past the next four years of university, and the two years of post graduate education after that. For the first time, my mind was challenged to look past the horizon, to stare blandly into the raging sun, to face the storm.
I won't reveal my life goal here, because it is, in my opinion, a very very personal thing. It is the very ambition that fuels us to improve ourselves. But I ask that if you're reading this post, ask yourself: what is your life goal? Have you been able to meet it (so far)? What has stopped/helped you? If one life goal didn't play out, could you work towards another?
Indeed, nights of revelation are also the nights that are most cherished and remembered. And these thoughts made tonight extra special.